"Show me the money!"

"SHOW ME THE MONEY!!!" -- Jerry Maguire

How many people remember this movie?  The above picture is from a phone conversation he had between himself and Rod Tidwell.  (Click the link above to see the movie clip)  Here he is asking Rod to stay his client, where eventually Rod asks him to say "Show me the money" and has him repeat it until he is shouting it in his office--with co-workers watching his bizarre antics.  What I have asked myself is how much money would it take to get me to do something like that?  First, answer the question for yourself...

For me, I think that the lower limit would be about $20.  What was yours?  Jerry was facing losing part of his income if Rod left his firm and went to someone else for contracts and public representation.  I'm not surprised he did all of that--though it is quite a humorous scene. 😁

Putting aside Jerry and all of his issues, I then asked myself, "What does God think of all of this money stuff we have in our lives?"  I mean that I just filed my taxes and needed all of the required paperwork in order to do that.  Recently, my wife and I opened savings account for our kids and that took a looooooong time.  Every month we go over our budget and make sure that we didn't overspend it.  Two summers ago we bought our first house.  And all of these things are part of how we spend the money that we've earned--and to avoid going into debt.

Years ago, my wife and I decided to get together and learn how to handle debt and money according to how God would want us to do that.  I know that I had wracked up almost $7k on a credit card, and wanted to be out of that way of acting.  My wife wanted us to be on the same page for what we spent and creating a budget.  We found an amazing program called "Financial Peace University" that was hosted by Dave Ramsey.  Before a couple years had passed we had eliminated all of our debt except student loans and were starting to build a legacy.

“We buy things we don't need with money we don't have to impress people we don't like.”  ― Dave Ramsey

This quote reminds me of the Bible verse Psalms 22:7 "The rich rule over the poor, and the borrower is slave to the lender."  People we love don't really care about the things we own.  If I have a solid roof over my head, food to eat, and some money to tithe then I have enough.  But far too often we get to a place where we worry about having the "next" or the "better" thing.  *Cough!* iPhones?

“Act your wage.” ― Dave Ramsey 

What does this mean?  Have I been trained to buy more than I have money for, to go the extra mile (with debt), and compete with my neighbors?  Yes.  People working for financial solution businesses out there are trying to make money.  This brings to mind the idea of "contentment" with where I am and what I have.  1 Timothy 6:6 says, "But godliness with contentment is great gain." and the following verses talk about how those who aren't content and allow money drive their wagon and fall into ruin and death.  Being content means knowing what I can and what I can not spend my money on, and what I need to have in place in order to spend anything--and be perfectly okay with that.

“Pray like it all depends on God, but work like it all depends on you.” ― Dave Ramsey

What makes this plan work for me is understanding two things: 1) Everything I have comes from God, and He gives me the strength and ability to do them 2) I have to go and do my best because participation in the relationship is key.  I don't just want to get by, I want to leave something for my grandkids to enjoy!  Proverbs 12:22 says, "A good person leaves an inheritance for their children’s children, but a sinner’s wealth is stored up for the righteous."

“Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired, and success achieved. HELEN KELLER” ― Quoted by Dave Ramsey 

This last quote contains important information for me personally: money management is part of my character, and that "character things" are often difficult and filled with issues. I have yet to encounter something that caused me to grow that didn't involve trouble.  Either I take a view that is not "normal" or there is some other obstacle in my way.  But!  Continuing to pursue God's way always has paid out dividends in the end, though there are often times when I cannot see the way.

All of the above quotes and information on handling money come from Financial Peace University and the website www.daveramsey.com

Ruined *sick!* Vacations!?!? 😰

Have you ever planned a vacation and then had it spoiled by someone getting sick?  I know that I have!  In fact this last Winter Break we had some free time that we were hoping to use productively around town.  However...my wife and I both got pretty sick.  Like five minutes up, and then back to bed for a couple hours more.  Yikes!

There was the "at least we got sick on vacation and didn't have to call in sick" line that we mentioned every now and then to each other.  But what am I supposed to do when I have other plans but then find myself in a place where I cannot participate?  Ideally, do what I can do and do my best to make myself better.  If I can help others I will do that, but I need to ultimately be better to serve better.

Have I ever experienced something similar to this in my personal faith?  ABSOLUTELY!  There have been many times throughout my life where I didn't get it and I chose to do things that were contrary to God's will for my life.  Some of those were either because I didn't realize what I was doing, or I wasn't in a relationship with Jesus Christ.  But there have been more times of spiritual sickness that I have experienced because of things I have chosen to do--since becoming a Christian.

I could create a long laundry list of things that I had done, ways that I found to sin.  But the point for me is that when I stop having good, solid relationships with other people in addition to my relationship with Jesus is the time when I am most apt to choose self-enjoyment, to choose sin in order to make myself feel "better."

During these times I have regretted my choices and then prayed to God, "Please forgive my sins and help me change, amen."  But I had not confessed these mistakes to another human being.

"Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so God can heal you. When a believing person prays, great things happen." James 5:16 (NCV)

It is in having these other relationships with that we truly get to express what God has already given to us: love.  I can be forgiven, but if I have not loved others, then I have never shared what Christ has done for me. When I get into a place where I feel sick and am hurting spiritually then I need to find people to share with.  Open and honestly.  My only caution for myself when doing this is to make sure I am sharing deeply only with trusted people.  I know I can share past pain with others, without really worrying about their trustworthiness.  But when I am struggling, sick, emotionally unsure, then I need guys around me that I trust and can share with.  How am I doing with that?  I have a couple friends that I can share with, but I need more to be truly open and honest on a regular basis.

God be with us and help us make good friends.

Frustration!!! What point is there anyway?

Ever feel frustrated?  I know that I do all the time!  It can be something humongous and complicated or tiny and small.  I have experienced a range of frustrations through my life.  How close that guy was when he cut in front of me in traffic this morning (like just missed my bumper!).  The tone of my wife's voice when she's relating something to me.  Being told that as I continue to grow older my body will be performing less and less as well than it used to--and there is nothing that I can do about that.  Things can really frustrate me, sometimes even to the point where it stops me from progressing onward.

So what am I feeling when I am frustrated?  I have been somewhat surprised to note that I feel many

Sometimes, right???

different feelings when I am frustrated.  I expected frustration to be some form of anger set on a low simmering heat, kind of like the sidewalks in Arizona in the summertime.  But that's not all there is to frustration.  There can be an air of melancholy desperation that causes me to be sad and want to just quit.  There can be the feeling of sinking in quicksand and being stuck, unable to get yourself out.  Frustration rears its ugly head when you are at a point where you cannot see a possibility of changing the situation that you're in.

So how have I learned to deal with frustration? I used to push all my feelings away and just try to disappear from the situation.  I used to try to control the situation, and the people, and how everyone felt about what was going on.  Even still today I still find myself trying to react like I used to: either disappear or use others.  But I have found a different path that I wanted to explore.

What I have found to be my most effective antidote to the clinging cancer of frustration is to know that there is actually a way out.  Whether it would come from me, another person, or God Himself; I need to know that there is a solution.  But how do I come to that knowledge?  It sure isn't easy--I definitely had found that I floundered in frustration's continuous grasp way too often.  When I am frustrated I often get too emotional to hear the truth or make changes in my behavior.  But the truth is what I need to have in my hands in order to break that grasp.




Here's what I have found helpful to find the truth in my situations in life:

1. Ask myself what I am feeling right at that moment.  Then I explore why I am feeling that way.
2. Ask myself what I am thinking.  Does that match my feelings?
3. Look for truth in my feelings and accept them.  Then let go of the things that aren't true.
4. Look for ways that I can follow in order to relieve myself of my frustration.
1. Sometimes I need to actually do something and not just sit there thinking about my frustration.  Am I afraid or angry?  Hungry or tired?  Lonely?  Do I just need to stand up and do my part?
2. Sometimes I need to ask someone else to help me.  This is probably the hardest thing for me to do, personally.  It can add frustration upon frustration if I am not careful.
3. Finally, there are times where there is nothing that I can do, nothing that other people can do, only God can find an answer or solution for me.  This is not a form of giving up, it is ultimately surrendering everything to God and trusting in him.

I have found these verses helpful when I am at the place where trusting God is what I need to do, what I am called to, what I must do:

33 “I told you these things so that you can have peace in me. In this world you will have trouble, but be brave! I have defeated the world.” John 16:33 (NCV)

7 Give all your worries to him, because he cares about you. 1 Peter 5:7 (NCV)

5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; 6 in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:5-6 (NIV)

11 "I say this because I know what I am planning for you,” says the Lord. “I have good plans for you, not plans to hurt you. I will give you hope and a good future. 12 Then you will call my name. You will come to me and pray to me, and I will listen to you. 13 You will search for me. And when you search for me with all your heart, you will find me!" Jeremiah 29:11-13 (NCV)

2 My brothers and sisters, when you have many kinds of troubles, you should be full of joy, 3 because you know that these troubles test your faith, and this will give you patience. 4 Let your patience show itself perfectly in what you do. Then you will be perfect and complete and will have everything you need. 5 But if any of you needs wisdom, you should ask God for it. He is generous to everyone and will give you wisdom without criticizing you. James 1:2-5 (NCV)

I have found peace in these Bible passages when I read through them.  And there are more!  The Bible has many passages that teach us how to accept where we are and then move forward.  Often though I have found that the only thing I need to move is myself--trusting in myself never works as well as trusting God.

Psalm 51: Responsibility and God

Have you ever had a bad day?  Not just a, "Got up on the wrong side of the bed," kind of day but one that truly sucks?  I know I have--many times.  Some have been health-related, out of my control, days.  Like the day I ended up rolling over in a Honda Civic three times with four other guys and survived.  Or the day where I was diagnosed with cancer and spent many, many, many days dealing with and healing from that close-to-death disease.  But none of those days left me with shame like the ones caused by my own decisions and choices.

What do I mean?  When I read through Paul's first letter to Timothy and read these words:

15 What I say is true, and you should fully accept it: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am the worst. 16 But I was given mercy so that in me, the worst of all sinners, Christ Jesus could show that he has patience without limit. His patience with me made me an example for those who would believe in him and have life forever.  (1 Tim 1:15-16 NCV)

Those words really struck a chord in my soul as I read them.  They were written by Paul who was considered to be one of the top leaders in the developing church and yet he still considered himself to be the worst of all sinners--and therefore greatly blessed by God's grace.  I too have felt myself to be someone who has sinned greatly in my life.  There have been many times in my life where I asked myself the question, "Should I do God's work today? Because I just did..." and would go ahead and do it but feeling increased guilt and shame as I did.

Then I heard from someone that God is bigger than we are.  I can't remember his name but I have been greatly affected by that statement.  God is bigger than my mistakes.  God can truly take everything I've done (sinful or not) and work that into the story of His grace for me.  I can take the prayer of King David found in Psalms 51:5-12 (NCV)

⁵ I was brought into this world in sin.
    In sin my mother gave birth to me.

⁶ You want me to be completely truthful,
    so teach me wisdom.
⁷ Take away my sin, and I will be clean.
    Wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.
⁸ Make me hear sounds of joy and gladness;
    let the bones you crushed be happy again.
⁹ Turn your face from my sins
    and wipe out all my guilt.

¹⁰ Create in me a pure heart, God,
    and make my spirit right again.
¹¹ Do not send me away from you
    or take your Holy Spirit away from me.
¹² Give me back the joy of your salvation.
    Keep me strong by giving me a willing spirit.

One of the things that made David a "Man of God" was how willing he was to turn and change when God called him to do that.  He took responsibility for his mistakes. He did not blame others or the situation.  He was by no means a sinless man, but he understood that he had a relationship with the Creator and Redeemer.  I have a model in Scripture that is not perfect, yet still longs for his Savior and wants to work his life in the ways of God.  That's what I want to do too.

I found this picture when doing some research on this blog.  Enjoy!

( I found it here: http://derekbruff.org/blogs/sketchnotes/2017/02/26/passion-psalm-51/ and he has awesome others to check out too!)

Are we truly free, or are we not?

Freedom!
When I hear this word I get an image in my mind from the movie Braveheart, where William Wallace is encouraging his side and yells, "Freedom!!!"  Where in my own life do I have a desire for freedom?  And what is freedom?

Freedom is: noun

1. the state of being free or at liberty rather than in confinement or under physical restraint: "He won his freedom after a retrial."
2. exemption from external control, interference, regulation, etc.
3. the power to determine action without restraint
4. political or national independence.
5. personal liberty, as opposed to bondage or slavery: "a slave who bought his freedom."

There are times when I feel like there is an enemy and that I am the target of all his attacks.  Whether or not that is true, I long for this feeling of freedom.  But what do I want freedom from?

I want freedom from:

• Pain/suffering
  
• Slavery
• Addiction
• Oppression
• Sexuality
• Cruelty
• Boredom
• Politics
• Self
• Others
• Emotions
• Technology
• The "MAN"
• Religion
• Body/Image
• Gossip/Criticism
• Government
• Too much to do
• Etc...

What am I really asking to be saved from?  What do I really want to be free of?  It seems complicated at first but the truth for me is that I want the freedom to do what I want when and where I want to do it.  But the truth is that we are never truly free.  My actions have consequences.  There is a cost for the things I choose to do, because with every "yes" there are a bunch of "no"s. Sometimes, when I am crying for "freedom," I am asking for there to not be consequences for my actions.  

So what?  There are situations that people these days still desperately need freedom from.  Are they crying needlessly?  No.  There are things that we can do to help them (and ourselves) from oppression.  Important things.  Things that we need to do.  But the greatest source of true freedom that I have ever found is Jesus Christ.  He loves me (and you too) and has worked to free me from the ultimate consequence: death, eternal death.  You see, our lack of freedom in the world ultimately stems from harms derived from a person's sins.  It could be our own sin or that of someone else.  Sin is where we "miss the mark," much like missing the target when shooting an arrow from a bow.  It could cause unintentional pain, or it could have done that because I wanted it to.  But it harms people, it harms me, and it harms Jesus as he took the consequences for it himself.

I don't really know how to explain how that works.  But I have faith that it is true. However, what does that have to do with what I said earlier?  There are ultimately two sides, led by two great sources.  Your choices will determine which one rules your life.  I have found that God's ways are always the best--even when it doesn't make sense in the right now.  The other source is calling me to try to please myself, try to put myself first in everything.  That doesn't seem to be bad, right?  But if I am the center of my own universe the other people in the world are just there to please me.  Does it work though if I am doing that, you are doing that, and we all seek our own selves first?  What that does is lead to envy, strife, hate, anger, fear, and aloneness as you sink further and further away from other people.

"5 Those who live following their sinful selves think only about things that their sinful selves want. But those who live following the Spirit are thinking about the things the Spirit wants them to do. 6 If people’s thinking is controlled by the sinful self, there is death. But if their thinking is controlled by the Spirit, there is life and peace. 7 When people’s thinking is controlled by the sinful self, they are against God, because they refuse to obey God’s law and really are not even able to obey God’s law. 8 Those people who are ruled by their sinful selves cannot please God.
9 But you are not ruled by your sinful selves. You are ruled by the Spirit, if that Spirit of God really lives in you. But the person who does not have the Spirit of Christ does not belong to Christ. 10 Your body will always be dead because of sin. But if Christ is in you, then the Spirit gives you life, because Christ made you right with God."  

Romans 8:5-10 (NIV)

For me, my life was headed towards death.  I thought that I was going to be okay because I had said the prayer where I told God I was a sinner and needed Him in my life.  But my actions were stating that I didn't truly believe that.  So instead I continued my sin and tried to lead others to God.  If I had continued my sin I truly would have died and created a bigger hole in the lives of my family than I already had.  I found out that I truly needed a relationship with other Christians and a real relationship with Jesus. Like when I had first prayed that prayer.  I was hopeless. Stuck.  What I needed was freedom and could only get that from Jesus.  I needed to shift who I was putting in the center of my universe.  No more me.  It needed to be Jesus.  I have been glad since then because since I have found a relationship with Jesus I have never been closer to Him than I am right now. Am I perfect?  No.  Do I still sin?  Yes.  Am I finding a difference in my life?  Absolutely, and the Holy Spirit is working on who I am as I learn to be more open and intimate with Him.  Freedom?  Yes, most definitely!  From what I thought I wanted?  No.  But freedom from sin and a relationship with someone greater than I could ever imagine is what I have gained.